I didn’t really know what to call this. I had considered “Back from Roskilde” or something like that, something that referred to returning from a European festival. More or less, it’s a sort of conversation with myself. It’s about me during the “high point” of Clap Your Hands coming home from yet another festival and questioning my motives for doing this line of work.
In my confusion, I would generally self-medicate to stop thinking about it (“dressing bathroom stalls with alcohol,” “still on your crutches,” drunken late night text,” etc.). The guilt about having so much opportunity but feeling fairly empty was not easy to reconcile. I think I’m mostly over it.
lyrics
Where to begin?
Let’s see, describe to me your injury in a drunken late night text
You’ve been hurt before and now want more
You can count on me to join you under the wreckage
For it seems we’re still the passengers, still Iggy’s loyal customers
In the city’s still ripped backsides
We will do what we need to keep this fantasy alive
Dressing bathroom stalls with alcohol,
You ask me to be to you more than a mother
I will meet you in the arrivals hall
I can tell you by the way you are still wearing your crutches
You made a scene there at the festival, a European spectacle
It was funny to play the clown
Now you wonder why you cannot keep your thoughts to yourself
Not make a sound
And despite out best efforts, here comes another new year
Walking in circles, you say, “I swear I’ve been here before”
I miss home
I miss that lazy comedy of pulling you up off the lawn
As it turns out, you are not so far away,
So says the ring on my phone
And it seems we’re still the passengers, still Iggy’s loyal customers
With the panic of dumb, dumb boys
For a while there I had nearly tricked myself into believing I had some kind of choice
And I can tell you’ve been thinking you can outrun all the nightmares
It took a while to find out some people care and some don’t
Yes, and despite out best efforts, here comes another new year
Walking in circles I wonder if we’ve been here all along
Where to begin?
Let’s see, describe to me your injury
Where should I send my regards?
Where should they go?
credits
from New Fragility (Deluxe Edition),
released February 12, 2021
Alec Ounsworth: vocals, keys, toy piano, guitar
Will Johnson: drums
Britton Beisenherz: bass